If you've been paying attention to the TV lately, you may have seen intrepid Bollocksist Matt Gardner (using his snooker pseudonym Shaun Murphy) reach the final of the World Snooker Championship.
As it stands, he's down 11 frames to 5 against twice-champion John Higgins, with 19 frames left to play.
Coverage resumes on BBC Two…—crap! It's on now!
Good evening, faithful reader. As you may be aware, there's been something of a financial cock-up over in America which, according to our fearless leader, has nothing to do with the Labour party.
Everyone's a bit skint now, and the pawn shop won't give us owt for the Twaddlebot, so we're having to cut costs a little.
All of which explains why The Bollocks is now scribbled on the side of an old cardboard box our Germans found out the back of Aldi.
Terrorist attacks—and in India. It's just not cricket.
Here at El Twad HQ, despite Top Gear's unremitting policy of driving things through them, we continue to erect new, elaborate and frankly questionable out-buildings.
The latest such is particularly absurd: in it we use our political influence to have books that contradict our authoritarian world-view removed from public libraries. We also advocate torturing people to try to make them more like us.
—facts about George W Bush that are absolutely, definitely true.
#89: even he thinks Barack Obama is already president.
